Be Happy

Be Happy!


Well, I know that this is my goal.   It has always been my goal.  I want to be happy.  Don't we all?


When growing up, I was happy, for the most part.  I remember riding my bike up and down the culdusacs of Rochester MN when I was in second and third grade.  I would laugh, sing, yell.  It was great.


Did I accomplish anything with all this riding around?  Not really.  I just had fun doing it.  (Well, I did ride by a girl's house that I liked, and sang songs while going in and out of her driveway, until her dad told me to stop coming around one night.  I still came around during the day.)

There were the expeditions to the rock shop.  My dad would take my brother and I, and we would look at all the crystals, geodes, rock collections, etc.  We would pick out a few tumbled rocks, and a few mineral specimens to put in our collections.

We shot off model rockets.  Dad and my brother and I would spend hours building them, getting engines, setting up the launching platforms, and away they went.  There was a thrill when one would take off.  We never knew if the parachute would open, never knew if the rocket would survive.


Later, I was happy when I went to summer camp as a camper.  Everything was an adventure.  Hikes, swims, camping out.  It was all exciting.


Be Happy?


Now, I really wonder what it would take to be as happy as I was when I was growing up.  Would it take going back to my childhood, and riding a bike, building a rocket, being a camper?  Or do all these things have something in common, some shared elements that lead me to be happy?


The Familiar vs. the Unfamiliar

Sometimes, I found that it was the familiar, the often repeated activity in which I was happy.  Everytime I have ever played pool, I was happy.  It didn't matter who I played against, or whether I won or lost.  I loved playing pool.  I was happy playing with the same set of friends over and over again.  I was happy going to the same town, in the same cabins, doing the same activities on holidays.

I was also happy when new situations and new activities came up.  Repelling, scuba diving, archery, a talk with a stranger, laser-tag, driving to places I had never been.  All these captured my attention because they were new and exciting.


Likes vs. Dislikes

Absolutely, I was happy doing things I liked.  This goes without saying.  I like summer camp.  I was happy doing it.  I liked making homemade ice cream.  I was happy doing it.

I was involved in building a rope suspension bridge once.  I hated it.  It was hot, and rainy, and as fast as we strung the ropes, they tightened up in the rain.  Everyone left us and went back to the campsite, but three of us.  We persevered!  I was so tired, so wet, so miserable.  Yet, the next day, I looked back on it and was happy.  Would I do it again.  No.   But I was happy to do it once.

Getting Things Done vs. Doing Nothing.

Sometimes, I would be happy because I accomplished something.  I was happy when I paid off my student loans.  I was happy when I got a house.  I was happy when I got a girlfriend.  Somedays, I am happy when I get through work.  Yeah weekend!!!

I sometime do nothing, get nothing done, accomplish nothing.  These are great days too.  I am happy driving nowhere.  I am happy laying down and just letting my mind wander.  Happiness comes when I am sitting down and watching TV.  Happiness happens when I haven't achieved a single goal for the day.

So what does this boil down to?

Comparisons

Happiness is linked to the comparisons I make. If you're always comparing what you have to the holdings of those who have more, you'll feel lacking; if you compare yourself to those less fortunate, you'll have a sense of abundance. Being grateful for what you have can definitely promote happiness, and it can also relieve stress. If you focus on how things could be better, how things should be better, you will likely have a much more intense experience of unhappiness.

Relationships

Happiness has oftentimes involved investing in close relationships with friends and family.  I tend to be happy when I am working on or engaging in activities with others. Close friends and family can share in your joy and help you during rougher times. They offer a supportive ear when you need one, or practical support when you need a helping hand.  They also offer me a chance to be supportive for them.

And Several Other Things

Here's a list of several other factors that play into happiness.  The following is a list of the 16 different features that may promote happiness.

I could spend time on each of these; that would be an accomplishment, but I am happy nonetheless.

Health
Self-Esteem
Goals, Values and Spiritual Life
Money
Work
Play
Learning
Creativity
Helping
Love
Friends
Children
Relatives
Home
Neighborhood
Community


The most important thing though, is that being happy is a choice.  It really doesn't matter the characteristics of a situation, an action, an activity.  It is a choice to be happy regardless.  I just have to remind myself, trick myself, that this is truly true.